Monday, September 22, 2008

TRIUMPHANT RETURN

NOTE: I am returning after a summer hiatus from writing. My normal subject matter of war and politics will return tomorrow after I vent on matters of personal conduct.



WHAT IS A GOOD PERSON?



Occasionally I will refer to someone as a "good man" or "good woman". It seems like a simple statement yet carries a specific connotation. We have all met individuals we would never call "good" for a variety of reasons. What exactly are reasonable standards of conduct for civilized folks nowadays? Of course we can generally accept the Ten Commandments standards, but a few deserve special comment.



Honesty comes to mind first. Sure, we've all told a little white lie here and there, but what I am referring to is complete honesty with those closest to you. Intentional deception is a heinous form of lying. Fooling someone into doing ones bidding or putting up a facade for whatever reason are unacceptable. Lying by omission is another sneaky form of dishonesty. Intentionally not revealing information vital to the individual involved is just as evil as a direct lie. Those who dabble around the edges of treachery are only fooling themselves and will eventually suffer the same disgrace as those who dive in all the way. It is extremely hurtful to people because each lie slowly erodes confidence and trust in the offender. Frequent liars often get caught in their own webs and are usually quickly identified. This is a deep character flaw that is not easily remedied or managed. Liars are not good people.



Most of us have suffered through adult relationships that saw some form of duplicitous behaviour that either bordered on or actually was cheating. Think about that: an individual gives a commitment, either in deed or word, to be monogamous, then later takes great effort to abandoning their own word. Breaking that vow is in itself lying, and there's usually a lot of it when a cheater is at work. Some people simply cannot commit to another individual within the framework of adult relations. They simply don't have the mental discipline or strength to conduct themselves with honor or control themselves. Others drift from new person to new person to soak up as much new attention as possible, an early sign of potential for cheating. Seeking a love relationship outside of a commitment qualifies, with or without actual sex. Cheaters are not good people.



Keeping your word is a related subject. Promises mean something. People who give a specific promise and then do not follow through are making themselves liars. There is very little hope for mankind if we cannot count on each others' word of honor. Promises were not made to be broken, they were made to allow people to trust each other. Anyone who will not keep a given promise should be viewed with a highly skeptical eye and not trusted further. Those who break promises are not good people.



Being a good person comes down to a simple element: can you be trusted to do the right thing? Good people do not require supervision or constant reminders to behave in an acceptable manner. It is their nature. People caught lying or being intentionally deceptive should not be trusted further until they redeem themselves wholly. None of us have time in our lives for the aggravation and humiliation of dealing with bad people in our personal lives. Our time on this planet is limited and shouldn't be wasted on those not even good enough to be honest or those who cannot treat other individuals with even the most basic of respect.

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